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Setback
ADD/ADHD & ODD Evaluations Broken Contracts Adelphi meeting Setback

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                                       SETBACK


On Thursday, April 15th, my son had a setback at the school. I got a message on my answering machine at home that he was in trouble.
Many people think that my son can control his behavior, when in fact, it is hard for him. With ADD/ADHD/ODD, a child acts impulsively, without thinking.
Well, my son did just that. I am so upset. This we did not need. The school will be jumping up and down for joy now. I was surprised that the principal didn't crack a smile when I went into the office. I took a witness with me. It is so bad, that I just cannot trust them anymore. How can a mother trust people that act like they are trying to help in one hand, and the other is slapping.
My son took pills out to the school. His one friend took one, and another boy took them out of his hands, and gave them out to others. Now the school has expelled my son from school for 3 days and the other boys for 1.
It did not take the school long to get the papers to me in the mail. I swear they sent them priority mail with a
pair of wings, and a smiley face. If only they could send detention notices that fast, that I have never received. Doesn't this say something?
Now it is up to the board to decide the fate of my son.
The same board that made the fate of my friend's daughter, now decides the fate of my own child. I am heartsick, I am devestated.
I have so many questions floating through my head. What if the school had seen fit to give my son an IEP all these years that I asked for one? What if they had given him more one on one attention, like they receive money for? What if they had given him a chance?
The other day, my son's one teacher pointed out to the class that my son was on his second warning, and then sent him to the office. Is that what our school calls a chance? Sending my son to Adelphi school is only a copout for this school. They push all those who they have received money for, but have used up, then pitch away like rubbage to somebody else.
I've never received options like I asked for. I've never been able to give my son 1/2 days, have an IEP, and have things done like Federal Law says they should be.
My son will be ripped out from me to go to this other school that is for problem students. They tell me that I shouldn't look at it as being bad. Well, how am I exactly supposed to look at it?
Who is to blame here? Who failed? I don't take myself out of the responsibility department, but just who refused us help all along?
I asked my son why he took the pills to school. He told me that he knew that I WAS UPSET with the way things were at school, and that he was taking them TO BE GOOD! I cannot cry more than I have this week.
Where is there Justice?
The school wants to keep it private---Why? So they can do what they wanted to do in the first place? I think the public needs to know what they are doing. If they are not ashamed, they wouldn't hush it up now would they?
I pray to God that my son did not keep those pills to try to kill himself. You see, so many parents I talk to in the school district have had suicidal children. In fact, we found someone who had. A mother's worst nightmare is being out of control, and having people who think they know the best (and don't) making decisions that they wouldn't even be able to make in their own home.
How many children's fates will come to rest on the schoolboard? I am so sick. I just can't talk anymore right now.


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The School's Neglect / The School's Compromises?

My son was given a 3 day suspension for his setback. The very next day when I got the slip in the mail, I took a good hard look at it. It had checks on things that did not happen. It had a check on a parent conference. I had a friend with me that can prove this did not happen. I told Mr. Davis that I would not discuss it, as I wanted to speak to my attorney first. He also marked on my son's slip that he was detained after school. So I guess that 1:30 in the afternoon is after school? It was also checked that my son was punished in class. He was not. I recall this slip in front of the principal when I went to the school to get my son. Apparantly it had been filled out before I even go there---before the facts were known.
Now the school called me yesterday. Mr. Davis called me on the phone, pretends he dropped the phone, and when he got back on it sounded hollow. I asked him if I was on the speaker phone. He said yes, but only Mrs. Defilippi was listening in on the conversation. Isn't tricking someone into this illegal? He told me that whether I believed it or not he had my son's best interest at heart. He said that he had talked to Mr. Vranasevic, and that they had decided that they would like to handle it without the schoolboard.
He said that he wanted to meet with me ASAP & the parole officer.
He said that he hoped that we could reach a compromise. He said that if we didn't, he didn't want to see my son being taken out of my home. He said that we never knew what the board would decide.
He told me that him and Dr. Vranasevic EXTENDED my son's suspension to the first of next week. I got a slip in the mail today with everything checked again. My son is so upset. They are doing so much damage to him. There has to be laws against this mental torture that they are putting him through. He is acting out over all of this. God Help Me!


 
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Last modified: April 22, 1999 01:15:37 PM

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